Dewfeine

I've invented a new word. Dewfeine. It's like caffeine, but better. I figure since caffeine comes from coffee (en francais: cafe), Dewfeine comes from Dew. And that's Dew with a capital D - short for Mountain Dew. Get it? Okay. Say it with me now "Dewfeine. D-E-W-F-E-I-N-E. Dewfeine". Here's what Webster's may someday print:

Dewfeine: noun. (doo-FEEN) The caffeine contained in Mountain Dew, a citrus flavored carbonated soft drink beverage known to cause the jitters, short attention spans, hyperness, and hilarious blogs. (i.e. I'm full of Dewfeine!)

Dewfeinate: verb. (DOO-fin-ate) To consume or to have consumed caffeine from Mountain Dew, approximately 98.6 micrograms per milliliter. See also Dewfeine. (i.e. I am Dewfeinated, You're going to be Dewfeinated, That 32 ouncer from Taco Bell will really Dewfeinate us.)

Except Webster's will print them in alphabetical order. Spread the use of Dewfeine by using this word whenever you consume the Midwest's #1 beverage. (At least that's what this site claims. They also list an official Mountain Dew Addicts Pledge. I should probably learn that one.) And yes I actually calculated the ug/mL of caffeine in Dew. 35 mg of caffeine per 12 ounces, baby!

This page is not sponsored, endorsed or in any way affiliated with Mountain Dew or Pepsi (or Taco Bell for that matter) and I think the names themselves are property of Pepsi (except for Taco Bell which is property of Taco Bell) but hopefully it's cool for me to use them as free advertising of how wonderful their beverage is. Dewfeine, Dewfeinate, and all subsequent dewfeinous conjugations are solely mine (as far as I know) seeing as how they emerged from a very sleep deprived but Dewfeinated mind. Happy Friday and if you can read this you have very good vision or just a really big computer screen.