Driving in Cars With Balloons

Wow! What a weekend! I had a super fun birthday celebration with my family today but I spent most of Saturday in the hospital. Don't worry, I wasn't IN the hospital, rather I was visiting my sister who was having a baby! She delivered a happy and healthy baby girl. She's quite the cutie, just like her mom. ;) I had an interesting time getting to the medical center though because I made the mistake of buying balloons ahead of time. Financially this was a wise move as party stores achieve the accounting miracle of making a profit while charging less than a third of what hospital gift shops deem reasonable. And balloons really are an ultimately ideal gift for a new arrival, but there is a slight issue in transporting them. I was too afraid of poppage to put them in the trunk (those who have ever seen the cluttered pit that is my car trunk will understand) so I designated the backseat as the bouquet containment area. I should probably explain that there were only two balloons but that one of them was a jumbo sized pink foot emblazoned with the phrase "It's a Girl!". (I'm not entirely certain why a foot is the new universal symbol for "baby" but it was a cute selection.) If you've never driven with balloons in your backseat, I'll explain that there are only two positions the helium filled atrocities will occupy: blocking the rear view mirror or obliterating your blind spot. And more often than not there will be multiple transitions between these placements as the trip progresses. And of course due to construction, ridiculously slow drivers, and a brush collection truck that was pelting my car with sticks I had to change lanes about eight times. That is, I had to change lanes about eight times while having pink mylar monsters flying between my rear view mirror and my blind spot. You can imagine me driving: one hand on the wheel, one hand on the turn signal and one hand frantically swatting balloons out of view. You're probably thinking that that doesn't add up - and you're right. Amazingly I avoided both accidents and traffic tickets but my inability to read the proper signage left me parked at the exact opposite end of the hospital complex from the Labor and Delivery entrance but I suppose I'll leave "Riding in Elevators With Balloons" for another time.