Wednesday, August 23, 2006

One Wants A Teller

Those that have been reading my ramblings for quite some time might pick up on the fact that in times of indecision and uncertainty I often quote a poem I read in high school with the opening phrase "One wants a teller in a time like this". Until recently I didn't realize that it's a Gwendolyn Brooks work but it seems I'm back in the state of my life of wanting "a teller". I know it's silly to want God to construct neon road signs of where to go and what to do, but I sometimes wish He'd put someone in my life that would approach me exuding infinite wisdom and guidance and tell me flat out "You know, lisa, here's what you should do with your life...." And then I could be presented with a year-by-year bulleted Power Point presentation of what to do and when. Okay, so that would make life really boring but still...

One wants a teller in a time like this
One's not a man, one's not a woman grown
To bear enormous business all alone.
One cannot walk this winding street with pride
Straight-shouldered, tranquil-eyed,
Knowing one knows for sure the way back home.
One wonders if one has a home.

I don't want to go into specifics about where my confusion and indecision are stemming from right now (most of you have heard the story and those that haven't can call or e-mail me and I'll tell you all about it) but needless to say, I have some choices to make and they're going to make for interesting directions of my future. No need to panic, if you haven't heard the plot yet, all roads are leading to good places it's just that sometimes that makes choices even more difficult. How does one choose the right path when all roads have advantages? I know how to choose a lesser of two proverbial evils, but how does one choose the greater of two goods?

One is not certain if or why or how.
One wants a Teller now:
Put on your rubbers and you won't catch a cold
Here's hell, there's heaven. Go to Sunday School
Be patient, time brings all good things--(and cool
Strong balm to calm the burning at the brain?) Behold,
Love's true, and triumphs; and God's actual.

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