Theft, Sundaes, & Frogs

No those aren't random Blogger Comment words, they're words to summarize my evening yesterday. I'll start with the worst which came up first: my wallet was stolen.

• Normally I keep my bag (with my purse in it) stowed away under my desk at work but I was in a rush yesterday morning and left it sitting on my chair. I was out of the lab for several hours in the morning for a training class which gave the thief ample opportunity to swipe it. Unfortunately I didn't notice it missing until I went to leave at the end of the day. So I had to stay late filing a police report and calling my credit/debit card companies to cancel everything. Frustrating? Heck yeah. But in a way I am lucky though because they didn't take my whole purse which means I still had my cell phone, keys, and driver's license (no one will ever think I'm strange again for keeping my ID in a separate sleeve of my purse).
  

Aside from the obvious feeling of victimization, the annoying part of the ordeal was being stuck so late at work. I was supposed to be on a bus at 5 on my way to the Museum of Science and Industry to meet Tony for the annual Members Open House that we reserved tickets for. It started at 5:30 but since I missed the last bus Tony picked me up at work and we headed over there together. This meant that we didn't get there until 7 but the event went until 9:30 so we still had time to see most of it.

• I wasn't expecting much from the event - mostly I wanted to go because parking was free and it was a chance to see the museum at night and hopefully with less crowds - but I was pleasantly surprised and impressed. It was something of an all-access pass to the museum and if seeing behind the scenes with the train set operators and security wasn't cool enough we were also treated to cookies, punch and a sundae bar! I'm guessing few have experienced it so let me just go on record as saying few things are cooler than wandering a museum after hours while building your own ice cream creation. There were also plenty of staff members chatting about their work, various science demonstrations, and circus performers throughout the main exhibit areas. It was a really awesome event and I'm considering renewing my membership just to do it again next year. (Plus we received information "off the record" that Body Worlds 2 might be arriving next spring.)
  

Also interesting about the Open House was that we were able to visit one of the special exhibits we had been wanting to see but haven't had time for on a weekend.

• We got to see Frogs: A Chorus of Colors and it was a really awesome exhibit. I've never seen so many sizes and colors of frogs and, like most of the MSI's exhibits, it was a perfect balance of education and aesthetics. Another great part of this exhibit was the reminder of what a genuinely nice man I'm married to. Sorry if that sounds ridiculously sappy but seriously, there's times where I'm just struck by how good and caring he is (and smart, handsome and funny too, of course). Not only did he drive way out of the way in crazy traffic to pick me up so I didn't have to hail a cab, but he bought me a frog. Not a real one, but a little stuffed green one. Okay, that sounds really cheesy but it was a sweet way to cheer me up after a rough day. I'll try to post a picture of it here later - I named it Dewey (long story) and he's super cute.

So that was my evening yesterday. Frustration and anger giving way to thankfulness at thoughts of "things could be worse"; low expectations being exceptionally exceeded; worries erased by a smiling green frog. Hopeless optimist: guilty as charged!

Unplugged

Consider this a series of random thoughts that have nothing to do with each other besides being simultaneously swimming in my head. Anyone who's a Red Eye reader can consider this my version of Ebersole's "Nine Lines".

• I had a Mountain Dew and a banana for breakfast this morning. What's worse is that I actually consider that a well-balanced meal. It was a weird Friday craving though, not a daily habit.

• I'm actually feeling sad about the death of a friend's fish. Told ya this would be random.
  

• Reflecting on a critic's review of the not-in-time-for-my-birthday but soon-to-be-released Fragile Things, author Neil Gaiman said:

  "Also nice to learn that I'm a neo-goth-pulp-noir author. Next time anyone asks me what kind of an author I am, I can finally tell them. I wonder if there are any other neo-goth-pulp-noir authors out there. We could form a society or something."

  I don't quite know why that cracked me up but he just keeps on earning his place on my Bestest Authors Ever List.

• Jasper Fforde is also on my Bestest Authors Ever List. I dare anyone to read The Big Over Easy and not be amused.

• Okay - I don't really have a Bestest Authors Ever List but now I think I should probably start one.

• Thanks to Lauren for unintentionally informing me that the Raconteurs sing "Steady as She Goes". I like that song and I hear it all the time on XRT and get it stuck in my head everytime I so much as think about the title. Thanks for letting me know which group is to blame for me humming it for the rest of my day/week/month/life...
  

• This blog is going nowhere - or maybe everywhere - fast. And to think, like my day, it all started with Mountain Dew.

• Speaking of Mountain Dew, they no longer serve it at Red Robin. They switched over to Coke products without my knowledge and I made a fool of myself ordering Dew there when the happy little Coke, Diet Coke, Sprite icons were smiling up at me from the bottom of the menu.

• They weren't actually smiling at me. That was just a lack of caffeine side-effect which is why I was trying to order MD in the first place (the drink, not the doctor). And then the waitress was being all polite and said "We don't have Mountain Dew... We have Sprite?" As if Sprite and Mountain Dew are even CLOSE to comparable - SHYEAH RIGHT!!!! Do you not understand the importance of caffeination??? Or should I say Dewfeination?!?? Okay calming down. "Steady as she goes, are you steady now..."
  

That's my thoughts for the day. Have a great weekend everyone!

Not Quite Shakespeare

Here's an article for all the bibliophiles out there. In a literary parody contest in LA, authors were asked to submit their imaginary worst first sentence of a novel. I've been trying to concoct what my own entry would be and I guarantee it would not have come close to the winning gem submitted by Jim Guigli :

"Detective Bart Lasiter was in his office studying the light from his one small window falling on his super burrito when the door swung open to reveal a woman whose body said you've had your last burrito for a while, whose face said angels did exist, and whose eyes said she could make you dig your own grave and lick the shovel clean."

What would your entry be?

Why I Love The Home Run Derby

Here we are, once again in the middle of summer and on the brink of MLB's All-Star game and I have six words to share: I Love The Home Run Derby! Seriously, folks, whoever invented this competition deserves an honorary spot in the Hall of Fame (of course as far as I know he - or she? - already has one). If anyone's unfamiliar with this rockin' event - it was on last night, I'm really sorry if you missed it - it involves a bunch of baseball's best sluggers of the season trying to do nothing other than hit the ball outta the park. That's it. No full-counts, no running bases, no pitchers' pick-off moves - it's all home runs, all the time! Each player gets an unlimited number of pitches so they can wait for the one they like best and then just swing away. For every hit ball that's not a home run it counts as an "out" but they up the margin from 3 to 10 so each guy gets quite a few chances.

But my favorite thing about the HRD is that it generally constitutes a complete role reversal in that players are the fans and fans become the players. Here's a group of big-tough-guy baseball players unabashedly cheering each other on. As with the All-Star game it's National vs. American League, so you'll get Yankees supporting Red Sox and Cardinals rooting for an Astro - meanwhile the fans show all the outfield talent, performing Olympic quality stunts to try to catch some of the balls. Last night's challenge at PNC park was exceptionally hilarious because of the Allegheny River that runs adjacent to the field. You might guess that a river would deter fans from gathering outside the park to fight for the far hit homer but instead it seemed actually to encourage them. I can just picture the conversations that occurred all over Pittsburgh's suburbs: "Honey, let's go kyaking... And bring your baseball glove!!"

As with most sporting events there's little at stake besides bragging rights and the Home Run Derby is ultimately all about fun and entertainment. For those that missed the actual event, the MLB video games for PS2 (and likely XBox as well) have a Home Run Derby level for do-it-yourself HRD entertainment. Unfortunately, the game doesn't come with crazy fans outside the stadiums but you will get the luxury of entering any player you like into the competition. Tony and I once created a "Funny Batting Stance" Home Run Derby and chose players such as Moises Alou, Gary Sheffield and Craig Counsel simply based on the silliness of their pre-swing stances. Our HR tallys never got high - likely because accuracy gave way to laughter a few too many times. Entertainment, pure and simple. And that, my friends, is why I Love the Home Run Derby.

The Movie Without The "S" Word

I went to see The Break-Up this weekend with a group of girlfriends. I can't say I loved it but I didn't hate it either. Mostly I think it just made me kind of sad. I'll try to avoid any spoilers here but the premise of the movie is that Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn play a couple that calls it quits on their relationship but neither one wants to move out of their awesome Chicago condo. (This is where I have to give the movie extreme props for actually being filmed in Chicago unlike the movie Chicago which was filmed in Canada. Go figure.) The movie progresses with some amusing but mean-spirited mind games played back and forth and the couple is obviously doomed even though both parties express to friends that they really do want to be together. That's where I got a little annoyed with Hollywood.

She wants him, he wants her - but neither one is willing to say that to the other. I know this plot line has been used in countless other movies too but in The Break-Up pride became the plot driving device. Both characters were at fault and what I found most saddening was that two words remained unsaid at all the right moments: "I'm Sorry". I felt like if at any time one of the leads simply uttered that small phrase you could cut to a hug and kiss and roll the credits (which is of course why it remained the movie without the "S" word). Not to say that an apology would -or ever does- fix everything but it would certainly start the train on the right tracks.

So the movie got me thinking a lot about apologies. "I'm sorry" doesn't inherently mean the same thing as "It's my fault" or "I was all wrong". Think about how many times we use the phrase to comfort people. If someone says "My dog just died", you can easily respond with "I'm so sorry" even if you are in no way related to, let alone responsible for, the death of said dog. We can be so comfortable and almost reflexive with our uses of "I'm sorry" to ease the pains of strangers or mere acquaintances but the words become more difficult when the hurt is in the eyes of loved ones. In relationships though, many times "I'm sorry" does become equated with "It's my fault" but that's no reason to let it go unsaid. Most conflicts really are the fault of both people involved - both speaker and listener are responsible for misinterpreted words - and it seems "I'm sorry" can easily and rightly be followed by "I'm sorry too". But "sorry" remains a choice. It's a decision to choose humility and put love for another person above pride. It's a decision to open a door to forgiveness. I'm probably oversimplifying most arguments, but on the other hand, when has a humble spirit ever made a situation worse?

Beer, Wine or *hic* Algae?

A couple of posts ago I mentioned a funny article about lovesick swans. It was thoroughly bizarre and I found myself asking, "Lovesick swans? What's next drunken pelicans?"

This article just goes to show, be careful what you wish for.

Unlanpqy, Mykdiv, and Gngxteu

Did I spontaneously learn how to speak Klingon?

Am I typing the sounds of The Star Spangled Banner sung with a mouthful of peanut butter?

Or am I typing out some randomly generated words from Blogger itself used for word identification inputs in the comments sections?

"Unlanpqy, Mykdiv and Gngxteu" may very well be the Klingon translation of Star Spangled Peanut Butter but it's also my brain-dead Friday realization that Blogger comment pages can come up with some really funny words for their word identification function. Granted this is probably the most pointless blog ever written but I needed something a little more lighthearted to post about and trying to pronounce "words" that come up for commenting can be pretty darn funny*. Besides - you know you're gonna try it now. Obnpzao... Nvmxti... Bmsyz...

*If you're like me and qualify as easily amused, overly caffeinated, overly tired, or all of the above.

"The Heart of the Matter"

I don't know quite what to say about a book that's simultaneously the most inspiring and most horrifying book I've ever read. Left To Tell narrates the life of Immaculee Ilibagiza, a young survivor of Rwanda's brutal genocide in the early 1990s. While her family, friends, neighbors and schoolmates were horrifically killed, Immaculee and seven other women survived by hiding for months in a pastor's closet-sized bathroom. Unable to speak to those hiding with her - for fear of being heard by their enemies - Immaculee passed time in prayer and meditation. Many of her prayers were for her own safety but what was much more shocking was how she prayed for forgiveness for those committing the atrocities against her loved ones. Let me repeat that - she prayed for the people who murdered her parents, she prayed for the people who decapitated and dismembered her brother with their machetes, she prayed for the people who raped and abused her friends and neighbors. My first thought was "She's a much better woman than me!" I'd be furious, depressed, outraged, and a whole list of other things that probably shouldn't be listed here... and she was forgiving? It's such an upside down - even absurd - concept to me but she goes on to describe that she felt so much hate and anger towards the murderers that without forgiveness she would become just like them. It seems so revolutionary, but it's by far the most radical, most extreme, and most correct scenario of how God intends his people to live. Forgiveness. For anything and everything done to us and our loved ones - complete and total forgiveness.

A friend of mine once confided in me that she wished she was closer to one of her parents. They had been through a rough situation and she pinpointed an incident that drew them very far apart. She told me, "I just don't see us ever being as close as we were before." Saddened by this remark I suggested, "Have you thought about what it would mean to forgive everything that's happened?" With pain and anger in her eyes she shot back "That's absolutely NOT possible." I know situations like this happen a lot but in light of Immaculee's testimony, how can we claim forgiveness to be impossible? Hard, yes. Difficult, for sure. Painful, you bet. But impossible?? Perhaps that's just a convenient word for "not worth my effort".

There's a quote I heard a while ago and I'm sure it's from some brilliant mega-Christian like C.S. Lewis, Billy Graham, or Oswald Chambers but it could just as easily be from R.A. Salvatore or Mark Twain. If you know who said it for sure, leave a comment but it says "Forgiveness is the fragrance the flower leaves on the heel of the one who crushed it" and I think that's an interesting way of putting it because too often we focus on being crushed flowers rather than becoming air fresheners. Oddly enough while pondering all this in my head this morning, I heard a great song on the radio. It's the title of this blog and the song's by The Eagles or maybe it's a Don Henley solo project (I can't tell the difference, really) - either way it sums things up pretty darn well.

I've been trying to get down to the heart of the matter
but my will gets weak and my thoughts seem to scatter
but I think it's about forgiveness, forgiveness...

These times are so uncertain,
there's a yearning undefined and people filled with rage.
We all need a little tenderness,
how can love survive in such a graceless age?
The trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness,
they're the very things we kill, I guess....

The more I know, the less I understand.
All the things I thought I'd figured out,
I have to learn again...

I've been trying to get down to the heart of the matter...
I think it's about forgiveness.

Please Hold On To Your Stearic Acid:

TO OUR METRA/BNSF RAILWAY CUSTOMERS:

At approximately 4:30 p.m. yesterday afternoon, service on the BNSF was halted after bags of stearic acid were discovered along the tracks. The bags of the white, powdery chemical normally used in candle and soap production had fallen from a freight train earlier in the day. It was not until we received a call from the Downers Grove Fire Department that anyone knew of the problem.

Although stearic acid is an extremely stable chemical, when released into the air, it can cause eye, skin or respiratory irritation. For that reason, the local fire departments and hazardous material teams felt that it was best that we not operate through the areas until the product was removed from the railbed.

We attempted to secure busses to carry customers around the initial site at Downers Grove, but there were only a limited number available. We knew that it would be a long and tedious process to transfer customers from train to bus to a train waiting beyond Downers Grove, but we felt that it was the only option. While we continued our attempts to secure additional busses, we were notified that the product had been found at various points between Cicero and Aurora. At that point, we had no choice but to wait for the entire line to be cleared. Unfortunately, this took several hours to accomplish. Train service finally resumed just after 8:15 p.m.

The problems continued this morning because the crews, who must observe federally mandated rest periods, were unable to return to work to operate their normal inbound trains. BNSF managers worked through the night to modify the schedule this morning in an attempt to provide as much service as possible.

Metra and BNSF personnel have remarked on the patience and understanding shown by all of you. We know that each of you probably had some plans last evening which were ultimately delayed or cancelled because of the service disruption. While our goal is to get everyone home on time, all the time, our most important responsibility is to get you there safely. Thank you for your calm and reasonable demeanor during what was, in all likelihood, your longest and most trying commute home.

Metra
6/16/06

Heart at Work

If you've been reading my blog for a while there's something I hope you've noticed. I try never to get too personal or sappy on here but sometimes issues weigh heavily in my soul and I feel the need to talk about them. It's that time again. For those that have really been reading my blog you probably expect some crazy remark to come out of left field right now that will turn this into a comedic post, but for those that really really follow my writing, you know I'm unpredictable and this time, I'm keeping things serious. As it has in the past ( Exhibit A, Exhibit B, Exhibit C, Exhibt D ) Africa is on my heart again. I've never been to Africa. I don't even know that it's somehwere I desire to go. But I know that my heart breaks for lots of people there. AIDS, famine, malaria, polio, genocide, war, malnutrition, and perhaps worst of all, the ongoing feeling of being forgotten by the rest of the world. How can a heart not break? But despite all these hardships, hope remains and prospers.

I want to spotlight two blogs of people doing some amazing work in Africa right now. Both have been added to my links section but here's a few little details. First is a group from my church and an organization called Global Family Rescue. Working in Rwanda, GFR provides sponsorships to families - pairing Rwandan families with Chicago suburbanites - and helps provide food, clothing, and education to children and job and life skills to adults with the goal of helping the families to become self-sufficient. Secondly is my friend and former coworker Colleen and an organization she cofounded called Brick by Brick dedicated to building a school for autistic children in Tanzania. What's unique and awesome about both of these organizations and their subsequent blogs is that you will not see Americans coming in as the saviors of Africa. Rather you see Americans and Africans working together, fostering real relationships, drawing upon skills of local people, developing resident leaders, and working together for positive solutions in which people can be empowered to help themselves. In a CCDA book I read recently (And You Call Yourself a Christian) and again in End of the Spear, the point is made that doing for others what they can do for themselves is charity at its worst. Developing others to become self-sufficient is charity at its best and extreme kudos to Global Family Rescue and Brick by Brick for recognizing that and putting it into practice.

It's the end of the world as we know it.....

.....And I feel fine!

Heard that classic REM song on the radio this morning and thought it was wildly appropriate with all the hullabaloo going on over today's 6/6/6 date. Please, people. It's just a date. It's a day to give to God just like every other Tuesday of the year.

But like the song says, I do feel fine and in fact I want to give this blog over to a different "End of..." namely the book I just started reading called End of the Spear by Steve Saint. It goes along with my goal of reading more NF this year and even just two chapters in it's quite captivating. For those unfamiliar with the title or the tale, in 1956 five missionaries were brutally killed in Ecuador by the Waodani, one of the most violent tribes in the world. The families of the missionaries then went to live among this tribe and teach them a peaceful way to live and found reconciliation through God's love. The story might ring a bell to those who have heard of Elisabeth Elliot (wife of murdered missionary Jim Elliot) but this book is told by Steve Saint whose father Nate was also one of the five killed. Let me know if any of you have read the book and also if anyone has seen the movie by the same name (should be out on video soon).

I am so cool!

Okay... so, not really, but I feel pretty cool today! I just met Jim McMahon! (Quarterback of the 85 Chicago Bears, "Rapper" in the SuperBowl Shuffle, All around cool guy) He's doing some fundraiser work for our lab so he came to visit us! I got to hang out and talk about my research with The Punky QB himself! ...And yes, he was wearing sunglasses!

Stop Looking At Me Swan!

I really don't know why, but I thought this article was hilarious. Turns out a swan in Germany fell in love with a swan-shaped paddle boat. And I thought it was only in Hollywood that men fell for brainless plastic females!

Speaking of Hollywood, I just got back from LA (...in case anyone was wondering about my lack of blogs lately... admit it, you know you missed me!) This was six days in LA after three in San Antonio with a two day stop at home in between. I'm just now discovering the joy of frequent flyer miles and also starting to pen a self help book titled "Why LAX Annoys Me". Hopefully I'll get some trip pics posted here sometime in the future but for now I'm just glad to be back to my usual state: The Big "I". No, not Illinois.... Insanity!

Mother's Day Advice

With the sentimentally beautiful holiday that is Mother's Day coming up this Sunday I thought I would pass on a little reminder of the respect that Moms deserve. And since I'm a little on the crazy side I figured I'd do it 80's style. But seriously, this post comes with a special shoutout and a HUGE thank you to my mom and all the other awesome mothers in my life - my aunts, my mother-in-law, my sister, my sister-in-law and all the other super awesome women I know raising kids!

The Great Debate

Bienvenidos a mis amigos! Como estan Ustedes? Estoy bien y esta semana es muy interestante. Lunes, en la ciudad de Chicago, habia mucha gente que.....

...What's that? You want me to speak English? Oh. Okay. Mind if I ask why?

Where'd you hear that? There's no official language of the US. If we were in Europe something like nine out of ten people would be fluent in multiple languages. But I digress, I really wanted to talk about a simple little word with a huge impact on society.

We'll make this a guessing game but I'll be nice and give a few hints....

It's more than two syllables...
Ends in "-ion" (pronounced like "shun")...
Greatly impacts people not born in the United States.....

Did you guess "Immigration????

Sound the bells and whistles 'cause you're absolutely WRONG!
But I do have a lovely parting gift for you....

See, the word I want to talk about is Compassion. Funny how it doesn't come to mind immediately when we think of all that's been in the news lately... But before we even consider being for or against guest worker programs or paths to citizenship, perhaps the wisest thing would be to have something of a heart check. I don't mean a stress test or an EKG, rather I mean we need to see where our hearts are at in looking at the situations others find themselves in. It's walking the proverbial mile in someone else's shoes that can lead us not only to the best laws for our land, but to the best relationships with our neighbors.

Walking to work yesterday I overheard a conversation between two women about the protests in the city and I found that their words shocked and angered me. "All those Mexicans are just stealing jobs from US citizens," one remarked and the other one responded "Yeah and then they send all their money back to their families so it completely drains the economy." My jaw hit the floor and only a lack of comprehension in their belief system (as well as the fact that my temper wanted to follow my intended words with fists) prevented me from jumping into their argument. So I shook my head - wanting to shake off their opinions - and walked a little faster. But their words stayed with me and bothered me more as I pondered them.

First of all when did "they" become a "them"? I understand that immigration is a hot button topic right now but who made this an us versus them issue? We're all living and working in this country. We all want safety in our jobs and communities, good education for our children, and for the government to protect our rights. Aren't all of us in the same boat? Is it too much to ask to seek common - which is usually higher - ground?

Secondly - and perhaps this was the part of the comment that most incensed me - why in the world is anyone allowed to refer to this particular group of people as "those Mexicans"??!? Comments like this remind me of three awesome Latinas that I am friends with from college. One has grandparents from Bolivia, one is Colombian and the third has her roots in Puerto Rico. Not one of them is "Mexicana" yet all three have testimonies of being incorrectly labeled as such. Sure the march in Chicago had a large supply of Mexican flags waving but there were plenty of Cuban, Puerto Rican, Colombian and Venezuelan flags also - just to name a few.

Thirdly, and back to my main point, what about compassion? Where did the attitude arise that Latino immigrants have it easy? Most of the so-called stolen jobs immigrants work in are not the types of things that many of us would classify as highly desirable employment. Forgive the possible stereotype but it is true that a majority of immigrants are working in basic labor jobs - housekeeping, manufacturing, janitorial service and other necessary positions that many of us take for granted. And many non-immigrants are quick to gripe that life would be easier for all of us if "they" would just learn English. And - really - is it too much to ask to expect "them" to work sixty hours a week at three minimum wage jobs to feed a family of eight and take time and money out of "their" pockets to learn a new and totally un-phoenetic language? After all there are LOADS of night and weekend ESL classes being offered to "them"......

It's about compassion folks. No one said the life of an immigrant is easy. Let's quit assuming it is. I'm not saying it should be a cakewalk, laws and legislations can be good for all of us, but lets at least quit making it harder than it needs to be. The best wisdom I've heard on this topic was someone who said the following:

"If one of your countrymen becomes poor and is unable to support himself among you, help him as you would an alien or a temporary resident, so he can continue to live among you."

Who said that? Who was this wise individual imagining a society of peace and harmony between neighbors - a place where compassion is lived out in tangible ways? Who could this brilliant speaker be??

Oh yeah, it was God. (Leviticus 25:35)